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Questions to Ponder

So many stupid questions, so little time. Just in case you DO have the time, here are a few questions you might take the time to ponder.

Why is "phonics" not spelled the way it sounds?

If quizzes are quizzical then what are tests?

If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?

If God dropped acid, would he see people?

Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?

Why do we say something is out of whack? What is a whack?

Why isn't 11 pronounced "onety-one"?

You can be overwhelmed and underwhelmed, but why can't you be simply whelmed?

Shouldn't the opposite of shut up be shut down?

If you get cheated by the Better Business Bureau, who do you complain to?

How come there aren't B batteries?

If you got in a cab and the driver drove backwards, would he end up owing you money?

Why is the word for "a fear of long words," hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia, so long?

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Why do they call it a TV "set" when you only get one?
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How do "Do not walk on the grass" signs get there?

If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?

If a husband dies, the wife is called a widow. If a child's parents die, the child is called an orphan. Why isn't there a word for a parent that loses a child?

Why is it that night falls but day breaks?

How do you remove a club soda stain?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?

When your pet bird sees you reading the newspaper, does he wonder why you're just sitting there, staring at carpeting?

How do people get discombobulated? Have you ever seen someone who was combobulated?

Who closes the door when the bus driver gets off?

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